Words from the burbs

Sucks.

I have no idea what the professor was talking about, nor do I comprehend any elements. I'm hoping to channel Jack McCoy tomorrow during the final.

 

O, Zule and I and the kids are going to disneyworld. It will take all of my self control not to take the heads off the characters to free the human inside. If there are humans inside. Maybe they're robots or clowns inside.

If I go in the basement and sleep on the ass couch, I cannot hear the birds. Peaceful solitude at last.

The birds have returned to my house. They have made a nest between the air conditioner and the rest of the window. They peck and chirp. They squack. They are adorable, but they wake up at 4:30 a.m. I wont let Zule remove the nest, b/c I'm nice like that, but after this round of hatchlings is gone, I'm going to wall that shit up like the crypt.

Today, my criminal law professor yelled "hey, ms. *lastname*" to me down the stairs, problem, at first I thought I was hallucinating a voice from the sky. I thought to myself, there it is, the final snap in your synapses, b/c he has a loud booming voice and sounds like James Earl Jones.  I was really relieved that it was my professor and not God or something. Earlier that day in his class, I was thinking about sex and I suppose I had a naughty grin on my face, b/c I got called upon to discuss the difference between larceny under the common law and "theft by taking" under the Model Penal Code. Penal hur hur. All students fear the "How would you distinguish these" questions, and it landed smack on my naughty little head.

since I was not paying an iota of attention, I looked at the board, looked at my book, and then looked at the law's little godsend "the definitions section" and nailed it. I was rather proud, considering what I was really thinking about. Thought balloons would be interesting, if they existed.

My contracts teacher said this over and over in class today "who is the third party beneficiary of Koch (a case)"... which he pronounced "cock".  We all nearly swallowed our tongues to keep from laughing.

No one would answer his question.

Except Zule had to face the cruel environs of target today to get Easter candy.

I just spent 9 hours of my day studying.

Then, I spent one half hour putting individual marshmallow peeps in plastic eggs. I must have some anger issues, b/c I really liked squishing them in to fit. Really, at our house, marshmallow peeps are the target of various atrocities, such as "blender jacuzzi" "microwave death" etc. My daughter is even more ingenious than I at faking their deaths.

Kentucky launches a full out assault on its gentle people each spring. One day, there is ice on your car. The next day, the grass is two feet tall.

On a good note, I can make the kids go outside and play. I also go outside and play, I like the outdoors. Unfortunately, I'm one of those people that get eaten alive by mosquitos, so I really only have april and may to play outside.

Our neighbors down the street have a full garden scale train set up in their yard. I've been taking sweatone to the trains each day, and the dude that runs it is so cool. The train has lollipops in it so that the kids can grab a lollipop from the train as it passes. (NO ITS NOT  A JOHN WAYNE GACY MOVE, FUCK YOURE FILTHY MINDS) Total zoning violation I'm certain, but the City of St. Matthews would have firebombings if they ever made the dude get rid of the permanent train set up in the front yard. After all, what could all we stressed out parents do with our kids at seven p.m. before evening t.v. comes on?

 

Today, we had to write a cover letter for something and I was the only person that had no problem with doing it. Apparently, most people have an issue with self-promotion. Not I, not I indeed. I figure if you can't promote your best skills, then you have issues. I helped them too, since I'm nice like that.

For example, I would not put on a cover letter that I am really lazy and look for a high-speed internet connection in a job, b/c I have a short attention span.

Instead, I'd focus on the positive. Lazy can translate to "Able to work in high-pressure environment." Why high-pressure? Well, b/c I'm lazy and put stuff off until the last minute. But once its due, well then, bitches, I rock.

Internet addiction? Similarly, one could say "Able to multitask" (you don't have to say "with multiple browsers open at once").

Really, when its stuff I love, I'll work my ass off. Ask Evil Randar. Its just a matter of presenting your best skills in the best light, and then presenting your worst things in a non-detractive light.

now I can't think of what I was going to blog, b/c there was an intervening screaming fit by my son when I walked in the door.

Okay, I'll make something up. Mostly, I've lost the ability to remember what nouns are called. I don't think its mad cow since I've spent many years of my life as a vegetarian, and most after the age of fifteen without eating red meat,  I think its law school. I study a lot, and all those outlines take up harddrive space in my brain. Totally, today, I wanted a pair of scissors, I could picture the scissors, but all I could say was "cuts. they cut". WTF?

And, my daughter spends her fifth straight hour on this site:

www.virtualmagickingdom.com

 

he is messing with theg mamae controller while I type. This time change has me so messed up. Why do we have daylight saving's time? I'm honestly curious what possible function this could serve in today's society.

I was at heine bros last nite, studying. It worked out r5eally w5e5xlxlz.

gots to go5zx.555zxz